My Internet Addiction

My daughters have been out of town since the afternoon of the 4th. They're spending the weekend with their maw-maw, Alan’s mom. I don’t normally have babysitters so having a bit of free time is nice but truthfully… I’m not happy. My internet went down about a week ago and I have to either go to my neighbors to work or sit at McDonald’s for hours, which is what I did yesterday! You truly don’t know how many weird people are in Asheville/Candler until you sit in one spot in the middle of town for 3 hours and watch as the people come in and out! What makes things worse is that I can never remember what I need to get done when I’m able to work. I seem to remember all the things that I needed to get done, after I return home. I have lists but they are not neat and I end up felling lost. By the time it’s time for me to head home, I’m frustrated as can be and realize that I've barely gotten anything done! My plans for my weekend without kids has been ruined and I can’t seem to look on the bright side. I wanted some peace and quiet to work and now I have to travel to even louder places to work and it’s not working. I’m losing my mind and feeling completely miserable during the one weekend that I have no kids to worry about. This won’t happen again, I don’t get babysitters. None watches my kids for me, not even if I need a baby sitter for something important… I can never find one. Alan’s mom is always up for watching our girls but she lives in Hudson, NC. It’s not like I can drop the kids off at her house for an hour or so and then pick them up later…. She’s atleast an hour away and she happens to be the only babysitter that we have. My family…. Is a whole different story that I don’t want to get into at the moment. The point is…. I am miserable without my internet connection! It’s sad, I know. I wish I didn't feel that way but I live online. Without the internet, I would of never known that my daddy-paw was diagnosed with Cancer, that my cousin was born, that my mama got a new job…. Truthfully, my family connects through Facebook and it extremely frustrating to discover IMPORTANT news (that someone should of called and let me know about) over social media. I guess that’s how times have changed but it drives me crazy, even more so that I don’t have my connection to discover all the randoms that happen within my odd little group of family members. If it wasn't for fb, I wouldn’t know what some of them even looked like! Sadly that is more true than it sounds, mainly for my dad’s side of the family, I haven’t seen some of them in years but speak to them online every now and then. All in all I’m an online addict and I’m seriously suffering from withdrawals! I wonder if they have classes for that like they do for serious addictions? I wonder if the classes have WiFi? J I guess that would be like asking if an AA meeting has beer…. We all know the answer to that one…. Bad joke, I know, and I’m sorry. My brain is in a very bad place right now and I’m trying to return it to a happy upright position. In the mean time… I believe I’m going to find me some string and go play with my Wizor, maybe I’ll get creative!

(Written on 7/6/2013 at 1:00pm EST)